John, the Cottager

I accidentally started to look after John, when his mum needed to look after him and knew where he is going to be happy. John was at my house for the whole days until night, so we had a lot of time for doing a lot of cheeky stuff together. Of course he loved it. But it wasn´t only about it, it was about mutual understanding as well.

He was just a great little fellow. When we went outside to see the sheep’s, he was running towards them and couldn´t understand why they are not playing with him the way he would like. With chickens he tried to lay eggs, he was pulling the rabbits ears and just knew what to do with anything he found. From this little age he was just a great Cottager.  (He was 22 month old)

Knowledge which I gained from looking after John is somehow a pointing key. At the time of looking after John, he was being potty trained. It was a summer and I was sitting with his mother on a garden, when John started to feel the urge to go to the toilet. He told his mum, and took off his pants. He was trying to push himself to the front as hard as he could to do it properly. He exercised like this for about two minutes, when all the sudden something came up, but from the back.. And of course all into the pants. (For me it was a funny situation, and I would have appreciate the fact that he was trying) but his mother didn´t think so she reproached him and left him like this for a good few minutes. During that time she was screaming and being really annoyed. When she finally left for clean clothes, John looked at me, smiled, looked at his excrement and clapped his hands as he couldn´t understand what is wrong – he tried, right? After a week I looked after John again. Mum told me: „You know, we have a problem with the toilet, John doesn´t want to make a poo, we even visited the doctor as he wouldn’t ´t go for a week.“

I knew exactly where it is coming from. I saw how the lack of the knowledge, impatience, insensitivity, and unnecessary demands of the parents can cause such an immense consequence on their children. I tried to help John as much as I could, but it wasn´t easy at that new point anymore. When you already pour out the basket of a pure, child freedom, it is very hard to pick it up again.